Dear Linkin Park, You Suck Now: An Open Letter

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Written by Dave Navarro, February 16th, 2017, at 10:36 p.m.

Dear Linkin Park,

It’s time we had a talk. We’re concerned with what you’re doing. You used to be pure angst channeled through cautious rap-rock that leaned heavily away from its rap side. You’ve had your experimental moments, but you may have gone too far this time. We’re not sure what to think anymore.

When Hybrid Theory dropped in late 2000, we were stunned. We were young and impressionable, and we just discovered what it meant to be a young person. Angst flowed through our blood like oxygen, carrying anger through our system to fuel unnecessary outbursts and bouts of stupidity. Then you came around and let us fuel that raw passion into thrashing our little heads around. We got to express ourselves through your music.

You were our champions riding on the back of already quickly fading acts like Limp Bizkit, and Papa Roach. But you built yourself heavier, and with a stronger rock core. Sure, we knew that Mike “I wish I was Fred Durst” Shinoda wasn’t the best, but he didn’t have to be. He played second fiddle to Chester Bennington, and we liked it that way.

But you had other plans. Sure, when you dropped Reanimation, we knew it wasn’t what we wanted, but we respected it, because it was good. Mike “I’m a real rapper” Shinoda took the album we all loved and twisted into something that sounded okay. A lot of us mistakenly attributed it to turntable master Mr. Hahn, and sure, he did a lot of the work on this one, but Mike “I need more spotlight” Shinoda was the true mastermind behind the breakaway.

Then Meteora dropped. Our worlds opened up. We realized that Linkin Park was more than just yelling and being angry at our parents and how badly misunderstood we were. Tracks like “Somewhere I Belong”, and “Numb” showed us that sensitivity and sadness were okay things to feel. We grew a little, and you helped us along with your music. Sure, Mike “Why am I angry at rappers?” Shinoda threw more of himself into the album, but we remember Chester belting his heart out more than anything else.

Then the end began. We already had a taste of a pattern, and so when Collision course dropped, we accepted it. You and Jay-Z were from different worlds, it couldn’t be more obvious, but we didn’t mind. We were full fledged fans by this point. We couldn’t help but be okay with it. And you know what, it was a critical success too. But, Mike “Please call me a rapper” Shinoda finally brushed shoulders with hip-hop greatness, and he liked it.

Actual fans at a Collision Course performance. They look so confused…

Fort Minor became a thing. And it took off a bit. People seemed to like it. Some of us didn’t really understand, but we heard that Chester was going off to do other things too, so we thought it’d all be okay. Somehow Minutes to Midnight came out next. Some of it was good. It felt like Linkin Park had grown up a little, which stood out against other bands that failed to mature with its audience, (we’re looking at you, Three Days Grace). Michael Bay locked you up to do a track for Transformers, and it was alright. A little commercial, but we couldn’t complain, not yet at least.

Finally, Dead by Sunrise dropped their album. It wasn’t met with a lot of fanfare. In fact a lot of fans had probably dropped off by this point. It didn’t get as much radio play as Mike “Jay-Z’s BFF” Shinoda’s The Rising Tied (yes, we see what you did there). In fact, it wasn’t received well by critics at all. The same people that were praising Fort Minor were turning their nose up at our favorite member’s solo project.

It didn’t matter, we got that you had to go and get paid. Main stream success takes its toll, and it was time to pay up. Some people called you sellouts. Others moved on entirely. But then you went and released A Thousand Suns. You got a little political, quoting Robert Openheimer and Martin Luther King Jr, but whatever, you were always a little strange. The music was officially different. You busted the genre, travelling closer and closer to that homogenized rock sound. You fell into the same black-hole of vanilla rock that seems to be orbiting U2. Just like everyone else who hit mainstream success, you were getting lame. You still had a place in our hearts, and we’d still rock out to “In The End” when it came up on someone’s iPhone, but you were something different now. And you did your third Transformers song.

2012 rolled around. LIVING THINGS dropped, and we thought somebody forgot to take their caps-lock off when naming all the songs. Somehow you sold over 200k albums in a week, and you won an award for making a song for a video game. Good on you, but we were gone. Most of us were totally tuned out. We didn’t care anymore. We knew that you were basically gone, and that the band we loved as kids had gone and died in a hole somewhere in Mike “I AM LINKIN PARK” Shinoda’s backyard.

Then your album sales tanked. You released Hunting Party in 2014, and it only sold 110,000 units in its first week. We were tuned out. Who cared? Somebody did, because slowly but surely we heard about this one. It was the Linkin Park we knew and loved as kids. Hybrid Theory got a little brother. It was angry, it was fast, and while some of it was derivative, it was a return to form. It slowly crawled towards a million albums sold worldwide, and it appeared as though you told Mike “It needs more rap” Shinoda to have a seat for this one. Fans were saying, “Have you heard the new Linkin Park? It’s actually good.”

Although we all said it a little too loud. Mike “LINKIN PARK IS NOTHING WITHOUT ME” Shinoda wouldn’t take this one lying down. He would come back with a vengeance. And it would be devastating.

Fast forward to today. “Heavy” the first track to be released since Hunting Party dropped. Would it be fast and angry like Hybrid Theory? Or better yet, were they creating a new pattern, and would it be more sensitive like Meteora? Mike “Fuck you, Chester” Shinoda was tired of being panned as the worst part of Linkin Park. So he took our favorite star from Dead By Sunrise, SawCrank, and Crank: High Voltage, and castrated him. “Heavy” features lyrics that may have once sounded good over a distorted guitar and a drum track that would drive your neighbors up the wall, but put it over a track that sounds like it belongs on the new Lorde album. It’s as though Chester had a Justin Bieber wig thrown on his head.

You let Mike “I have a BFA in Illistration” (actually true) Shinoda run away with this one. We tried so hard to be loyal fans, and we got so far together, but in the end, it didn’t even matter. You were so willing to let us down. So ready to throw away years of an up and down relationship.

We’ve had enough. We’re moving on to bands that will treat us better. You’ve had your chances. Call us when you get rid of Mike “The thing is, there are so many different ways to make music these days with virtual instruments, software applications, physical instruments, and computer programs” (actual quote) Shinoda.

Sincerely and with great regret,

Fans from the 2000’s

P.S. More Dead by Sunrise would be great.

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