Top 10 “fuck you” moments in video games
1/6/2016

Video games are something that we as a culture have really come to love and adore.

We can fall deep into their stories and characters to the point of where we can have emotional connections to them to the point of excitement, joy, and even sadness. We make new lives every time we put in a new game and boot up that console, whether it be retro or current-gen. However, what about when these games that we absolutely love and dedicate so much of our lives to decide to take a stand, look you dead in the eyes, and say “fuck you?” There are plenty of these times games do this to us spanning the years and of all my time playing these are my top 10 moments games said “fuck you” to my emotions, my wallet, and my feelings.

10. The Covenant of Champions – Dark Souls 2

We know the Souls series to be brutally difficult with many rage quits, impossible bosses and enemies, and broken controllers. It throws into absolute hell with very little tips and tricks. So why would you want to make this worse? Well you wouldn’t, but with From Software not giving much info to their main area Majula in Dark Souls 2, but offering many covenants to join, many players stumble across an old stone offering you to join the Covenant of Champions, which, if you do join, unknowingly increases the already brutal difficulty immensely.

9. The death of The Boss – Metal Gear Solid 3: Snake Eater

Metal Gear is definitely a difficult story to follow along with unless you have played every game from the beginning MSX and kept good track of where it is heading. For those of us that did do that, we knew of The Boss and how much of an influence she was on main character, Naked Snake. She was his mentor who taught him everything he knows. Since the beginning, she was his best friend, and Snake actually developed a love for his mentor. So it was truly a heart breaking moment when you learn of her supposed defect from America to join the Soviets, and it all leading to the remarkable cut scene watching Snake kill his mentor, thus taking the name Big Boss.

8. The execution of John Marsten – Red Dead Redemption

Outlaw, murderer, gang leader, and family man. John Marsten has definitely had quite the life. His story spans a lot of the western United States and some of Mexico as he is trying to redeem himself from his past life of an outlaw and lawbreaker so he can settle down on his ranch with his wife and child and put it all behind him. The rage boils deep when after we finish his very, very long and arduous journey when we watch him get gunned down in front of his family by the government who set him up for death since the beginning.

7. Death of Aeris – Final Fantasy VII

One of the most-known characters in gaming history has got to be Cloud Strife. The main protagonist from Final Fantasy VII sets out on a task to take down Shinra Corp. and figure out who he his. Along his way, he meets a nice slum girl, Aeris, who ends up being one of the Ancients who hold an important role in the world, and Cloud is to protect her. So as we watch Sepheroth’s sword pierce through her chest as she falls limp, I almost shed a tear.

6. Red crystal crouching tornado – Castlevania II: Simon’s Quest

Simon’s Quest is one of those games for the NES that was one of the most confusing games for me, to date. It was full of secrets and hidden areas around every corner, with absolutely no clue where they were or how to access them. The one most known is when you enter a screen and it’s an absolute dead end, with a red crystal that you’ve had for quite some time that seemed to have no purpose. To progress in this game, you must equip the red crystal and crouch right next to the wall and wait about 30 seconds for a red tornado to appear and take you away. Now who the hell would know to do that without help?

5. Pyramid Head – Silent Hill 2

Silent Hill 2 is one of the best Silent Hill games in the franchise. It has a super deep story, many scary environments, and creepy enemies. One of the worst enemies is Pyramid Head, who appears at the worst times, stalking you throughout the game while wielding a huge blade that is so heavy it must be dragged behind him. Even after you’ve loaded many bullets into his towering body, he didn’t even seemed phased.

4. Electrified Seaweed – Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles

Underwater levels suck. Especially on the NES with clunky controllers, and bad hit radius. So Ninja Turtles decided to take the difficulty of the underwater level and up the ante, adding in a very small time limit that, even when done perfectly, is still very hard to hit, and putting in electrified seaweed through the level that offers virtually no room for movement and, when slightly touched, takes a whole life.

3. Princess is in another castle – Super Mario Bros

We all know the words, “Sorry, Mario, but our princess is in another castle.” After spending countless hours running levels, killing Goombas, and grabbing flagpoles, I was devestaed to make it through the castle, beat Bowser, and run to the next room to see Toad sitting there with his smug-ass face telling me how it was all for nothing. Thanks, Mario.

2. Ornstein and Smough – Dark Souls

As mentioned, for the covenant of champions Dark Souls sucks with difficulty, but these two take the cake. We have battled dragons, demons, and the undead. Having died probably thousands of times we finally make it to the end of beautiful, golden, Anor Londo. As we traverse the fog gate we see not just one boss, but two! They are each excruciatingly hard on their own, but then they team up and feed off of one another’s power, where if you kill on,e if refills the other life bar and makes them noticeably stronger and tougher, while giving the other a new attack move. Losing souls and trudging back from the bonfire, we all know the feeling of rage that caused many broken controllers.

1. Turbo Tunnel – Battletoads

Anyone who had an NES probably had the game Battletoads, and most of those people most likely never made it past Level 3, the Turbo Tunnel. This level is infamously known as one of the hardest areas in all of gaming and, for it being a simple NES game, the difficulty is astounding. The horrid part of it is the fact you only have three lives and, once those are gone, then it’s all the way back to Level 1. If you manage to make it to the Turbo Tunnel with all three lives intact, you are pretty lucky or pretty skilled but it’s almost a guarantee that you will lose more than one on this level. It has breakneck speed, obstacles in the foreground and background, and obstacles that need to be vaulted over. It doesn’t sound that difficult but just go watch a video or try it for yourself and slowly come to the realization this is one game you probably will not beat. There is a 2-player option that helps with the earlier levels, and later areas given to you both are coordinated and work together, but, on the Turbo Tunnel, it is absolute hell because if one of you hits an obstacle and dies, you both go all the way back to the beginning, and after those three lives, it is back to the start.